I’m in no form competitive, but a challenge is something I can’t turn down. One evening I was sat with drinks in hand, chatting to the two friends who probably know me the best; I was told me I’d not be able to go without social media for a day, let alone a month. I wasn’t going to let that slide.

I get their point, I’ve posted at least one story every day for the last year or two.. I’m literally known as the content creator for all social events, and if there’s something that should have been caught on camera, I’ve probably already got it. It’s a bit of a love hate relationship, because I love capturing the moment, getting creative & sharing my experiences, but it comes at a cost; sometimes it not always easy to see that cost.

I always justified it because I like photography and it was a platform to share that. Deep down I knew it caused me anxiety and unhappiness. Constantly seeing everyones highlight reels, questioning whether you should post anything unless it was perfect, and even then it wouldn’t be as good as the next person. What would they think? Is this just proving how boring my life is? Why am I not travelling south east asia right now.. or sipping a latte in that cafe in LA..

So when my friends challenged a whole month without social media, I of course accepted.

Did you know a month is actually quite a long time? Like four whole weeks..

At first it felt good to just delete the apps. Almost a relief for a bit of peace.

Then came the silence.

I had to sit down with my breakfast and stare out of the window. I couldn’t scroll/watch a few stories, or see what workout Mari Lewellyn had done in LA that morning. It was really odd. I found myself randomly picking up my phone, unlocking it, realising I couldn’t look at anything and putting it down again.

The first two weeks were the hardest. I found myself with a lot of spare time, and so I picked up my laptop and wrote five blog posts, back to back. Something I’d been trying to achieve in the past 6 months. It was like the frazzled noise I constantly felt around me had dispersed, I could concentrate again and my creativity started to come back.

Funnily enough, it took me back to overcoming my addiction to sugar.
There’s four stages of overcoming addiction. At first you think it’s a breeze – giving up wont be hard. Then it starts to hit and you feel lost and low. Then you get angry, because how could you let something take this much control over you? Then comes the determination. If it’s anything like the fiery determination I felt (told you I like a challenge) there really is no stopping it.
That’s the point when you realise there is no going back, because why would you give up what you’ve just worked so hard to achieve?

That’s where I am now.

I have far less anxiety, I’m more present, I no longer compare myself to others and I can ACTUALLY relax. Because shock-horror but sitting on your phone scrolling is not relaxing. (We all know this but refuse to accept because we know no different). When I’ve spoken to others about this, they actually want to quit too, but aren’t sure if they can. It’s easy to come up with many reasons as to why you can’t, but that’s how addictions work 🤷‍♀️

The important bit is you’re not cutting yourself off completely.

There’s a big fear of FOMO when quitting is mentioned, but you have to remember you can still see your friends in real life.. all you’re quitting is staring at your phone screen.

In order to quit, you need to delete the apps – because the addiction comes from constantly opening the apps in autopilot. I recommend deleting the Facebook app, Snapchat & Instagram. I continued to use the Facebook Messenger app to speak to my family overseas, and the Business Suite app to be able to use the messaging function of Instagram (ensuring you turn off any other notifications from this, the only aspect you want is to message).

Once you’ve completed your month, it’s up to you what you do next, but my experience sealed the deal. I re-downloaded snapchat to see what had been sent to me and realised I’d missed out on nothing. So I deleted it again. Facebook I had no desire to return to, because I didn’t want to get back to scrolling, and I can check it periodically on my laptop if I want to. Instagram, I missed posting my photos so I decided I wouldn’t give that up however I only post via a scheduling app (currently Planoly, although i’m tempted to move to Later, we shall see).

My next plan..

I’ve missed writing blog posts & travel updates, and I still use them as references for places I’ve been and to hold the memories. So with the spare time and extra creative space I’ve gained, I’m going to focus on this alongside my photography & video work, in order to improve my skillset.

I want to rebrand my site too so I can seperate my travel from my professional work, so you’ll see a few changes make their way through soon.

The stupid thing is, the person you follow that lives in what looks like a life of pure perfection, that you really aspire to be, is actually comparing themselves to someone else, questioning their own abilities. We’re stuck in this vicious cycle, and we don’t know how to get out. It’s an addiction thats just become normalilty.

So whats your plan? Are you going to challenge yourself too?

Harriet 📷